It’s been a while since we did any political song parodies here. I love the genre, which is why I e-mailed this song to the McCain campaign a few days before he and Obama appeared at the annual Al Smith Dinner last week, swapping regular-guy stories and making fun of themselves.
Okay, McCain’s stuff was good, and maybe he’ll find time to sing my song after Nov. 4, when he’ll have a bit more time on his hands, but I still think at some point he should have stepped to the mike, gestured to the band, and said something like…
Thank you, thank you, thanks so much…You know, I’ve made a career out of bipartisan effort in the Senate. I’ve worked with Democrats like Russ Feingold and Ted Kennedy and others on so many issues ranging from campaign finance reform to comprehensive immigration and the use of torture and global warming, and, well, as you can see, it’s gotten me absolutely nothing. Nada. In fact, I’ve been successfully painted as George Bush with skin cancer. And that’s why I gotta ask this question, with apologies to Burt Bacharach and Dionne Warwick: “What Do You Get. . . When You Work With Dems? ” (nods to band). Here’s my answer:
What do you get when you cross the aisle?
You only get lies and innuendos,
And when you run,
They won’t defend you,
I’ll…never work with Dems agaaaaiiiin!
I’ll… never work with Dems again….
What do you get when you break the ranks,
And cast your vote with ancient rivals?
They call you a Klans-man with a Bible!
I’ll… never work with Dems agaiaaainnn!
I’ll..never work with Dems again.
Don’t tell me ’bout the common good,
I did my part and I sure got screwed!
Tried it on torture and immigation,
Welcome to– Obama Nation!
What do you get when you work with Dems,
They paint you as a clone of that friggin’ Dubya,
And all the cable zealots drub ya,
I’ll…never work with Dems agaiinnnnn.
I’ll…never work with Dems again.
(repeat until Election Day)