Mullah Says Janeane Garofalo Must Die

You just never know what kind of response you’ll get on the vast Interbloggintube these days.

 A few days ago I did a post on the Blackwater controversy. That brought the following reply from someone identifying himself as “Mullah Cimoc” from Waziristan, a region of Pakistan bordering on Afghanistan.  It’s written in such a Borat-like parody of crypto-English that I at first thought it might be a hoax, and I can’t rule that out.

But: Assuming this is a real message from a real person,  it  provides insight into just how some Islamic people look at the United States. And it ain’t pretty at all.

Apparently the Mullah was cruising YouTube–you know those Mullahs– when he came across a Bill Maher show in which Maher, “comedian/actress” Janeane Garofalo and others discuss the U. S. relationship with Israel and the Middle East in general.

 First, he suggests that we watch a YouTube clip of the Maher show. If you want to do that, click   and run the counter to about 7:10, where you’ll see Maher talking with his panel.

 If you don’t have time for the video, the nutshell is this: A tattooed Garofalo, wearing a low-cut blouse, slams the U. S. for being too cozy with Israel. Maher gets a bit huffy with her on that score.

 So here’s the Mullah’s view of this typically American scene:

 mullah cimoc say aemriki need watch this video for the two point:

1. Cursor very end to discuss round table, then to watch one woman “jenine garafalo” and look with your eye her tattoo arms … so sick to stomach. this proving that amerika right now be destroy to very foundation. in waziristan this woman to be the treat different. not allow to act whore and luring and trap the good and pure young woman by bad example. also –if him tv man to put this show to quetta, pakistan NWFP tv, him to be assassinate in just few day — by him own family. this the so disgrace and ashame.

2. This bill mayer him not the comedian. him the agent for masters in tel aviv? him the so political correct. him example usa media not free just so control by him master in tel aviv.

who want make the bad influence to ameriki you girl? This the so evil and the wicked.

Bottom line and translation:

 1.  Ms. Garofalo is a media-savvy Ho of Babylon whose fame warps innocent young people to follow her into slutdom. (In other words, just what we’ve been telling our kids! No, I’m kidding.)

 2. She proves the utter moral rottenness of America.

3. In Waziristan or other devout countries, she  would not be allowed to trumpet her strumpetry. Presumably, she would be soundly beaten, wrapped in a burka and packed off home by her angry husband. And the vile  producers of the Maher show would be murdered by their own humiliated families.

 4. Maher, one of the Bush administration’s most tireless critics, is actually a paid agent of his “Tel Aviv masters.”  His perfidy proves there is no true free press in America.

 Again, assuming this is a genuine note from a genuine Taliban-style Mullah, it points up the fascinating, and perhaps intractable, differences between  Western liberal democracies and some of our Islamic enemies.

 We see the Maher-Garofalo stuff as just part of the endless buzzing chatter machine of a highly individualistic society in which the true religion is the First Amendment. Saying what you mean, whether or not you have any idea what you’re talking about, is for most Americans the ultimate freedom. Almost 7,000 Marines died at Iwo Jima so that Ms. G could have her tats, her cleavage and her opinions.

 We’re so used to flicking on the radio or TV and hearing somebody rattle on with their beliefs, however unpopular and controversial, that we can’t realize how different, how shocking, and how wrong that appears in many countries around the world.

I’m writing a bit flippantly here,  but freedom of speech is part of the American gamble, as I’ve discussed elsewhere. It’s messy, chaotic, sometimes intellectually incoherent, and it can lead us down all kinds of crazy roads to dead ends. It allows both morons and genuises, sinners and saints to grab the microphone.

 But the great majority of Americans would rather take the dicey path of almost unrestrained free speech than trade places with Waziristan, Russia, Cuba, the “Democratic Republic of the Congo,” (yeah, right), or Burma.

So, as the Mullah says, look with your eye her tattoo arms. In the eyes of some angry people around the world, those arms may as well be holding up the torch of the Statue of Liberty. To these narrow minds, she is America itself.

 And you know what? If I have to take sides between the Mullah and Ms. G.,between 14th Century repression and the right of any “actress-comedian” to discuss foreign policy, I know whose side I’m on.

But. . . can we do something about those tattoos?

3 thoughts on “Mullah Says Janeane Garofalo Must Die

  1. it seems that the mullah was indicating that any tv producer in quetta pakistan who put a similiar show on pakistan tv (including a woman with tattoos) would be assassinated by his own family with just a day or two.

  2. Oh, man, Chris, I can’t decide if the mullah is funny or not. I mean, it’s sad, but I just can’t get the whole Borat thing out of my head now! Yeah, as a young Amerik woman, I totally look up to JG (????)

    Anyway, thanks for visiting and commenting at!

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